I’ve never been the serious type, back in high school I was the class clown, always looking for a reason to laugh and have fun, my mom would joke that my future wife would have a hard time with me. It’s not that I didn’t take my life, education, and future seriously, it’s that I would rather have fun and be laughing during the journey.

What I was always afraid of when I got married was having to change my personality and be someone else. I was afraid that the Khalid I loved would be someone different from the Khalid she loved. I was afraid that my silliness and jokes would be replaced with being serious and strict.

The reason I had that fear more than my friends is because I felt that culturally someone who laughed a lot and had a fun view of life wouldn’t be taken seriously, whether that was at work, within the community, and even within the family that I wanted to marry into.

The one important conversation we had before getting married was about our personalities, how we viewed our lives and the community we were part of, and more importantly how we wanted to be viewed by others. By the end of those conversations we always came to the same conclusion, all we cared about is how we felt about each other, and always wanted to be true to ourselves and love each other for who we truly are.

You know how many people talk negatively about the “Comfort Zone”, how there is no growth in the comfort zone and how you need to challenge yourself and get our of your comfort zone as often as possible.

I can tell you from experience, that is true for everything except your relationship with your partner. Nothing means more than being comfortable with who you are when you are with the person you love, and nothing means more at the end of the day that the person you love loving you just the way you are.