In his famous poem on marriage Khalil Gibran said “let there be spaces in your togetherness”, when I first read the poem I thought it simply meant giving each other the freedom to pursue the things we want, when we want, how we want.

When you first start a relationship or marriage big spaces already exist in the form of different interests, different ambitions, and possibly different values. Gradually those spaces get filled in time through love and understanding for one another.

However some spaces still remain, in my case I always wanted to pursue writing full time, I kept that to myself, hidden away from Salama for years. I knew I needed a steady job and stability to support the family, even though the work I was doing was far from the things I was passionate about.

Then one day in a discussion about our dreams for the future I told her my dream was to become a full-time writer, and that I was most engaged and in the zone when I expressing myself thought my writing. The first thing she asked was “How long have you wanted to do this?” I just responded “For years”

After that she pushed me to work on a plan to transition to writing full time, she helped me save money so we would have money to support us when I left my job, she pushed me to write more and improve, and whenever I would bring up my worries of things not working out she simply said “You are a great writer, I believe in you”

What I learned through that experience is although I had this personal ambition and space I wanted for my life I did nothing by hiding it away and keeping it to myself, but by sharing it with the person I loved I got support, confidence, and someone who made my take action. I needed someone on the edge of that space, someone I knew who would always be there for me, just close enough to make me feel safe to dream big dreams and take big steps that will change my life forever.